Politically Correct Tale of Ants and Grasshopper

Are you sick and tired of those “conservative” fairy tales? Are you an American liberal or someone from Europe who thinks those fairy tales teach values that no longer need to be promoted in today’s world? Well, we are coming to your rescue with our “Politically Correct Fairy Tales!”

Hansel and Gretel

Hansel and Gretel were lost in the woods when they came upon a house made of candy and cake. An old witch invited them in and then captured both of them intending to eat them. Gretel had a chance save both of them by pushing the old woman in an oven but she decided that it would be wrong not to respect the witch’s cultural traditions. So Gretel and her brother allowed themselves to be cooked and eaten. The witch was so happy with the children’s actions that she invited all of her witch friends to the area. Soon thereafter, they ate every child in a hundred mile radius. Soon the whole area was filled with nothing but child eating witches and all the witches were very happy! 

The Moral of the Story:: You must respect the culture of others, even at your own expense! 

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The Ants and the Grasshopper

All summer long the ants worked and prepared for the winter while the grasshopper went to Rage Against the Machine concerts and played Everquest. The grasshopper laughed and laughed at the ants for working so hard. Then winter came. The ants had plenty of food and shelter while the grasshopper had none. So the government took the ants tax money and built the grasshopper a house, gave him welfare cheese to eat, and paid for courses at the local university that the grasshopper didn’t bother to go to. When the ants complained everyone agreed that they were greedy rich jerks for having more than the grasshopper. 

The Moral of the Story:: Taking money from people who work hard and giving it to the lazy is compassionate! 

Thanks to Right Wing News

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