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Monday, September 29, 2014

ISIS vs. Duck Dynasty

IF ISIS/ISIL SHOULD EVER COME TO AMERICA, THEY WOULD BE WELL ADVISED TO AVOID WEST MONROE, LOUISIANA THE HOME TOWN OF THE BOYS OF DUCK DYNASTY.  THEIR BEST BET WOULD BE SAN FRANCISCO, WHERE THE MEN ARE.........WELL YOU KNOW!!!!! 
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Saturday, September 27, 2014

MORE LITTLE JOHNNY

Little Johnny came home from school one day slightly confused. His mother was Jewish and his father was Black.So Johnny asks, "Mommy, am I more Jewish, or more Black?""What does it really matter?" his mother tells him. "If you want to know for sure, you'll just have to ask your father."

So, when his father arrived home from work, Little Johnny asks the same question Daddy, am I more Jewish or more Black?""What the hell kind of a question is that? Why do you want to know if you're more Jewish or more Black?" asks his dad.

“Well, it's like this dad. Tommy down the street wants to sell his bicycle for $50, and I don't know whether to Jew him down to $25, or wait until it's dark and just steal the damn thing."

Fight Jihad: Breed Super Pig-Dogs

SUPPORT OUR TROOPS AND JOIN THE GROWING MOVEMENT TO BREED "SUPER PIG DOGS" TO FIGHT ISLAMIC TERRORIST.  THIS NEW HYBRID CANNOT ONLY SNIFF OUT THE ENEMY, BUT SEND HIM INTO A PANICKED FLIGHT BY HIS MERE PRESENCE.  EMBED CODE
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Friday, September 26, 2014

ISIS is Obama's Baby

JUST LIKE HIS FORMER PAL, THE MOST REV. WRIGHT SAID, "BARACK'S CHICKENS HAVE COME HOME TO ROOST".  LIFE'S A BITCH AT TIMES AIN'T IT BARRY! 
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Wednesday, September 24, 2014

14 Year Old Virgin awaiting her ISIS Lover

SOMEWHERE IN THAT MYTHICAL ISLAMIC SHANGI-LA A VIRGIN IS WAITING.  WAITING TO EMBRACE A MARTYRED ISIS WARRIOR.  SHE HAS ADORNED HERSELF WITH THE FINEST JEWELS.  JEWELS FIT FOR A SULTAN.  AS THE SWEET SMELL OF AN EXOTIC "BARNYARD" INCENSE FLOATS ACROSS HER BED CHAMBERS, SHE IS READY FOR THE WARM EMBRACE OF HER ISIS LOVER WHOSE SCIMITAR IS DRENCHED WITH THE BLOOD OF INFIDELS.  INFIDELS WHO REFUSED TO ACCEPT THE TEACHINGS OF THE PROPHET.  THE GREAT FALLEN WARRIOR WAS HEARD TO UTTER BUT ONE PHRASE UPON ENTERING HER CHAMBER,  اللعنة أين هو بلدي الماعز TRANSLATED "DAMN WHERE IS MY GOAT"!  
ALSO POSTED AT STOP OBAMA SATIRE & CARTOONS
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Bombing vs. Funding Terrorist

THE OBAMA ADMINISTRATION IS PATTING ITSELF ON THE BACK FOR BRINGING NATIONS LIKE QATAR AND SAUDI ARABIA INTO THE COALITION TO ATTACK ISIS/ISIL IN SYRIA.  THE ONLY PROBLEM IS THAT IT IS ESTIMATED THAT FOR EVERY DOLLAR THEY SPEND ATTACKING ISIS THEY SEND 10 TIMES THAT MUCH TO THE COFFERS OF THAT SAME TERRORIST GROUP.  CARTOON BY DANA SUMMERS  
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Tuesday, September 23, 2014

The shocking truth about Obama's "No Boots on the Ground" promise

SHOULD ANYONE BELIEVE THAT OBAMA'S PROMISE NOT TO PUT AMERICAN BOOTS ON THE GROUND IN IRAQ AND SYRIA THEY NEED A FRICKING HEAD EXAM.  WE ALREADY HAVE BOOTS ON THE GROUND WITH MANY MORE TO FOLLOW.  THE PRESIDENT IS KEENLY AWARE THAT WITHOUT THEM THE WAR AGAINST ISIL/ISIS IS DOOMED TO FAILURE. 
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Monday, September 22, 2014

General Barack Obama

I DO SUSPECT THAT SECRETLY, OBAMA WOULD LOVE TO FIRE ALL THE GENERALS IN THE MILITARY.  AFTER ALL HE CONSIDERS HIMSELF A MILITARY GENIUS AND HAS LITTLE USE FOR AMATEURS.   
CARTOON BY CHIP BOK 
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Friday, September 19, 2014

Today's Paul Revere "The Illegal Immigrants are coming"

THE LATEST WAVE OF ILLEGALS FROM THE SOUTH CAME BRINGING INFECTIOUS DISEASES.  DESPITE THIS THEY WERE SCATTERED TO THE 4 CORNERS OF THE UNITED STATES AND GIVEN WAIVERS ON VACCINATIONS REQUIRED FOR NATIVE BORN AMERICANS.  WTF GIVES HERE.
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Thursday, September 18, 2014

Freedom of Expression vs. McCarthyism

THE LONG AND SHORT OF THIS STORY IS THAT LIBERALS CLAIM TO BE IN FAVOR OF "FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION".  THAT IS FREEDOM OF EXPRESSION FOR EVERYONE EXCEPT FOR THOSE WHO DISAGREE WITH THEM. 
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Wednesday, September 17, 2014

President Obama, "EBOLA is not Islamic"

PRESIDENT OBAMA RECENTLY TOLD THE WORLD THAT ISIS/ISIL WAS NOT ISLAMIC.  ONE MUST WONDER IF THIS IS THE REASON HE KEEPS INSISTING THAT WE WILL PUT NO BOOTS ON THE GROUND IN SYRIA OR IRAQ.  IF IT IS SUDDENLY REVEALED THAT ISIS/ISIL IS INDEED AN ISLAMIC ORGANIZATION WOULD HE THEN PUT BOOTS ON THE GROUND OR PERHAPS STOP ALL AIRSTRIKES AGAINST THESE ENEMIES OF AMERICA. 
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Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Butch, the Rooster, wins "No Bell Piece Prize"

Fred was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young pullets and ten roosters to fertilize the eggs. He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup  pot and was replaced. 
This took a lot of time, so he bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters. Each bell had a different tone, so he could tell from a distance, which rooster was performing. Now, he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report by just listening to the bells. 
 Fred's favorite rooster, old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but this morning he noticed old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all! When he went to investigate, he saw the other roosters were busy chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing, but the pullets, hearing the roosters coming, would run for cover. 
To Fred's amazement, old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one. Fred was so proud of old Butch, he entered him in the Brisbane City Show and he became an overnight sensation among the judges. 
The result was the judges not only awarded old Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize," but they also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well. 
Clearly old Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the unsuspecting populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.Vote carefully in the next election, you can't always hear the bells.  

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Monday, September 15, 2014

Brave Man Jokes

How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
Marry It! 

What is the difference between a battery and a woman? 
 A battery has a positive side. 

Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist? 
Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there.. 

How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good? 
Put a nipple on it. 

Why do women fake orgasms ? 
Because they think men care. 

What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes? 
Nothing, she's been told twice already. 

If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? 
Made her chain too long. 

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman? Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you. 

Why do women have smaller feet than men? 
 It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink. 

Why do men pass gas more than women? 
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure. 

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first ? 
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in. 

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%.. It's called a Wedding Cake. 

Why do men die before their wives? They want to.  

Friday, September 12, 2014

Liberals cling to their Obama Phones and Welfare Checks

SOMETIME BACK OBAMA ACCUSED SOME CONSERVATIVES OF CLINGING TO THEIR "GUNS AND BIBLES", BUT SAID NOTHING ABOUT LIBERALS CLINGING TO THEIR OBAMA PHONES AND WELFARE CHECKS.
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Thursday, September 11, 2014

Obama's strategy to protect Americans from ISIS Head-hunters

OBAMA'S STRATEGY TO PROTECT AMERICANS FROM ISIS/ISIL HEAD-HUNTERS IS GAINING SUPPORT IN CONGRESS WITH THAT BODY ABOUT TO APPROVE $5 BILLION FOR THE SPECIFIC PURPOSE OF PROVIDING ALL CITIZENS WITH THE ULTIMATE PROTECTION AGAINST THE "SWORD OF ISIS"!  
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Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Will Obama Destroy the World?

JUST THIS WEEK RUSSIA TESTED A NEW NUCLEAR MISSILE---THE FIRST IN MANY YEARS.  COUPLED WITH THAT PUTIN HAS STEPPED UP HIS PRACTICE BOMBING RUNS ON THE UNITED STATES.  THE PERCEIVED WEAKNESS OF PRESIDENT OBAMA HAS EMBOLDENED  BOTH RUSSIA AND CHINA TO TAKE MORE AGGRESSIVE MOVES TOWARD THE U.S.  IN THIS CLIMATE DANGEROUS MISCALCULATIONS COULD LEAD TO UNINTENDED WAR----NUCLEAR WAR!!!!!  
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Sunday, September 7, 2014

Sex and good Grammar

On his 70th birthday, a man was given a gift certificate from his wife. The certificate was for a consultation with an Indian medicine man living on a nearby reservation who was rumored to have a simple cure for erectile dysfunction! 
The husband went to the reservation and saw the medicine man. The old Indian gave him a potion and with a grip on his shoulder warned, 'This is a powerful medicine. You take only a teaspoonful, and then say '1-2-3.' When you do, you will become more manly than you have ever been in your life, and you can perform for as long as you want." 
The man thanked the old Indian and as he walked away, he turned and asked, "How do I stop the medicine from working?" "Your partner must say '1-2-3-4,' he responded, "but when she does, the medicine will not work again until the next full moon." He was very eager to see if it worked so he went home, showered, shaved, took a spoonful of the medicine, and then invited his wife to join him in the bedroom. 
 When she came in, he took off his clothes and said, "1-2-3!" Immediately, he was the manliest of men. His wife was excited and began throwing off her clothes, and then she asked, "What was the 1-2-3 for?" And that, boys and girls, is why we should never end our sentences with a preposition, because we could end up with a dangling participle.

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Liberal Press losing their heads to support Obama's narrative

SEEMS THOSE IN THE MEDIA FOR THE MOST PART FAWN OVER EVERY ARTICULATE WORD OUR DEAR LEADER UTTERS.  AND WITH THE SAME BREATH LABEL RACIST ANYONE WHO DARES TO SAY HE IS ARTICULATE.  IT APPEARS THAT EVERY TIME SOME MUSLIM TERRORIST GROUP COMMITS A HEINOUS ACT OBAMA FOR THE MOST PART IS QUICK TO CONDEMN, BUT HE SELDOM DOES SO WITHOUT FIRST PRAISING IN SOME WAY THE GREATNESS OF THE PROPHET AND CALLING ISLAM, A RELIGION OF PEACE.  BUT THEN, THOSE WHO HELPED BARACK IN HIS EARLY DAYS UNDERSTAND THE WORLD, WERE QUICK TO POINT OUT THE EVILS OF THE WHITE MAN AND CAPITALISM AND BLAMED WESTERN NATIONS LIKE AMERICA FOR ALL THE WORLDS TROUBLES.  ABOVE IMAGE FROM POLITIFAKE 
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Thursday, September 4, 2014

How the Media sees Protestors

WHEN IT COMES TO PROTESTORS THE MEDIA IS INCLINED TO CANONIZE THOSE ON THE LEFT WHILE DEMONIZING THOSE FROM THE RIGHT.  HELL, THAT IS NOTHING NEW.  CARTOON BY WILLIAM WARREN 
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Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Waiting for your Welfare Check

Just when you thought you’d seen everything! No reason to stand on your feet while waiting to get your welfare check. Just put your flip-flops next in line and go back and sit on your lazy butt and play games on your free iPhone. Is this a great country or what?  





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Tuesday, September 2, 2014

Rick Perry turns table on Drunk Driving District Attorney

GOVERNOR RICK PERRY HAS JUST TURNED THE TABLES ON DISTRICT ATTORNEY ROSEMARY LEHMBERG BY USING HIS MUG SHOT ON JUST RELEASED T-SHIRT! 



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Monday, September 1, 2014

President Assad New Ally of United States

WILL THE BUTCHER OF DAMASCUS, PRESIDENT ASSAD, BECOME THE NEW ALLY OF BARACK OBAMA IN THE WAR ON ISIS?  SEEMS THAT POLITICS DOES MAKE STRANGE BEDFELLOWS.   
CARTOON BY  GARY VARVEL
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